• Morgan Fagg

Who organised the Four Seasons?

Caught between a rock and a hard place.

I know I already wrote a blog about Mayor Rudy Giuliani's press conference and admitted that we have all made mistakes and gotten things wrong in the past but the level of utter incompetence involved here is beyond imagination.


Who, and how do you make such a mistake? Last week, we learned that actress Maria Bakalova had toured the White House and last month we learned that Rudy Giuliani was caught with his pants down.

Not literally, caught with his pants down but almost as he was interupted by Borat with his hands down his pants. He argues that he was just adjusting his shirt but most people don't lie down on a bed (with a Russian reporter present) to tuck their shirt in.


He was tricked but after becoming the laughing stock of the world, the star of Borat 2 should have resigned from the campaign or been fired as a liability.

Giulini really puts the lie into liability and has made some outrageous claims about the election but it was his choice of Location, Location, Location that has really shown how unprepared and incompetent the Trump campaign is.


Who googled the Four Seasons or did they phone? Surely a phone call would have cleared this all up.


Hello, I'd like to book the Four Seasons for a press conference.

- Okay but we're a Landscaping firm. Try next door.


Hello, is that the Four Seasons?

- Yes

Can we get a podium and a room large enogh for the world's media?

- I guess, what's a podium, and we don't have any large rooms. Call down to our offices and maybe talk to my boss. Our offices are beside the adult bookstore and the crematoriam.

Hello is that stupid foreign reporter Borat?

I need a funny situation to distract from that scene with your daughter.


There is an even funnier story behind this mistake that we have yet to hear and it is hard to imagine how anyone can be this badly orgainised.


Did they google, "nearest Four Seasons" or sex-shop, or ask Siri, or did they find a business card for Fantasy Island sex-shop that was half-torn and said:

for all your pervy needs from DVDs to dildos, call down to Fantasy Island on State Road,

situated next to Four Seasons, Landscaping.


Ok, their Facebook page actually offers: "Sexual pleasure toys,Lotions,Lubes,ADULT DvD's,magazines,Sexual enhancement pills for women & men.Adult peep show PRIVATE Viewing Booth's.,And so much more"

I can imagine the Trump campaign never contacted anyone and never booked the Four Seasons but thought they could do a press conference outside without permission because Rudy is Trump's lawyer.


Maybe Rudy started to shout at whoever tried to correct the error and then they said nothing about this epic fail, or maybe they were too busy writing their tell all book to care about another cock-up.


Maybe whoever tried organising this "Shitshow" doesn't speak much English because five seconds on the phone should have resolved this mess unless they really wanted to go there.

Are they trolling themselves with this PR stunt or something? Didn't Trump have a boardroom on the Apprentice?


Wouldn't the White House have been a better location than a landscaping firm? I know Melania destroyed the Rose Garden recently but the White House at least has a Press Room for fuck's sake.


Location, Location, Location, maybe we should look into Trump's choice of Russian hotels AGAIN.


CDC GUIDELINES: I wish Fantasy Island Adult Bookstore well. I've read their Facebook posts and they have been advising customers to wear masks, socially distance and buy dildos since March.





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© 2018 by Morgan Fagg.