• Morgan Fagg

I have nothing to declare but his Genius

Updated: Aug 16, 2019

Hear no, See no and Know no comedy

Lost in the gods, Anna and I took our seats at the very back of theatre Galileo Galilei to listen to the genius of comedian Dylan Moran.


I say genius as the witty Meath man has been called the Oscar Wilde of comedy and the wild Wilde made a name for himself in America when he is rumoured to have declared, "I have nothing to declare except my genius" while passing through customs on his American tour.

Oscar Wilde travelled and talked but nothing compared to Dylan Moran who was enjoying yet another sold out show in Madrid before travelling to Barcelona where he will play on Saturday 13th of April.


According to El Pais, Dylan Moran holds the record as the biggest-selling English-language show ever seen in the country after his last show in Sala Apollo in Barcelona.


He will play a total of 74 dates as part of his Dr Cosmos tour which includes 42 in the United Kingdom as well as 30 additional international dates excluding his two Spanish shows.


Sadly for my girlfriend his Irish humour was lost on her but I am reminded of an Oscar Wilde quote, "The moment you think you understand a great work of art, it's dead for you."

Wilde got around Europe but nothing like Moran and the next time he is in Madrid I will have to contact him in time to see if I can photograph him by one of the two bars in my neighbourhood that show Wilde's likeness outside their entrance.


Outside the theatre, I had time to enjoy one more laugh as I met Alan Lawlor and I reminded him that the last time I saw him, we were looking at each other through the shot glasses of a one eyed man's glass eye and a round of drink after a Christmas party night out that concluded at 6am. As they say,

"it is all fun and games until someone drinks an eyeball".

Eyesore: that's a powerful eyewash.

Dylan Moran, famous for his role in the tv series Black Books and films like Sean of the Dead was brilliant but from the cheap seats at the back in was difficult to hear everything and impossible for poor Anna to understand all the Irish references.

A humour difficult to understand, I'm sure for most Spaniards but Dylan Moran holds the record at attracting the most amount of people to an English speaking act in Spain.

In the land of the blind drunk, the one eyed man is king but back to Dylan Moran's performance and Mr Moran certainly has an unusual eye for detail.


Starting back in 1970's rural Ireland and telling stories about frozen food tested on the Irish, dating, sexuality, vegans and waiting for women to save the world after the impact seen in movements like the #Me2 movement.


Holy Cow, Catholic Ireland was remembered as a very different place than today before children

became dependent on technology to answer all their questions and entertain them 24/7.

There was no wifi in the countryside when he was a child and he used to wander around fields watching other children trying to hot wire cows.

They say, "There are only two tragedies in life, not getting what you want and getting it," for me I was delighted to receive two tickets from a friend on my birthday but equally disappointed not to be able to share the humour of a Meath man known as the Oscar Wilde of comedy, with my girlfriend.

The genius of Oscar Wilde lives on like the Picture of Dorian Gray and even today as I watch episodes of Penny Dreadful, I can see the immortal image of Dorian Gray lives on.


According to Oscar Wilde, "We are all in the gutter but some of us are looking at the stars."

For some that was from the gods of Sala Galileo Galilei on Friday April 12th.

As the comedic star moves onto Barcelona I doubt he is declaring his genius as Spanish officials might not understand his sense of humour.

Wilde's wise witty words


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